I’ve obtained a bone to choose with Ms. Greta:
How dare me? How dare you! I believed the planet was boiling and the glaciers have been melting and that by now my youngsters wouldn’t know what snow appears like and I’d be dodging falling coconuts in February. But this winter’s kicking the crap out of us. So what provides!?!
Yeah yeah, I do know what you’re going to say. “That’s not how local weather change works!” Oh, spare me. I WAS PROMISED A SEARING-HOT FUTURE AND THAT’S WHAT I WANT!!! I’m uninterested in icy winds, and frozen, blighted landscapes, and squinting because the snow cowl redirects the rays of the solar straight into my retinas:
Oh, don’t get me improper, I’m making the most effective of it. When the paths are frozen and I’m heading out on the Roadini:
And when the snow is deep and the roads are a multitude I’m on the market on the be-fendered Homer:
However the older I get the extra interminable the winters appear. Maybe I have to retire to some biking paradise with a gentle local weather, just like the Mediterranean, or Frederick, MD:
The place “On a regular basis Ray” has ridden his bicycle each single day for over seven* years:
*[Note to Intern: check that math.]
So is he possessed of an unusual fortitude? Or is Frederick merely a biking paradise?
Oh, and in the event you’re questioning, On a regular basis Ray owns six bikes, and one among them’s a Seven:
So I assume you can say he’s all sixes and Sevens.
Sorry.
In any case, neither snow nor rain nor warmth nor fool motorist stays this Frederick Fred from the swift completion of his appointed journey:
Good for him, and lengthy might he cycle–although it does happen to me that there isn’t any simpler partner to cuckold than a bike owner, given our completely reliable day by day disappearances. In actual fact, a few of us even share our precise location always to make it even simpler!
And but few of us suppose to do the identical with our bikes, although it’s in all probability not a foul concept:
Apparently an AirTag led police proper to the situation:
I used to be in fact extra excited about studying about this “one-of-a-kind bicycle,” which turned out to be a Pivot Firebird:
I’m completely out of it in terms of suspension bicycles, so I headed over to the Pivot website to see what it was all about:
I shortly discovered that that is the perfect bicycle in the event you’re trying to don a full-face helmet and hump the watermelon:
I additionally watched this extremely informative video:
From which I discovered the Firebird boasts a trunnion-mounted something-or-other that appears just like the bike has an oil derrick in its crotch:
I don’t know what any of these phrases imply, however presumably the factor within the center is the Johnson rod:
I assume I’ve automobiles on the mind since I’ve been trying to diagnose a test engine mild on my getting older four-wheeled inner combustion recumbent, and I’ve gotten about so far as getting the code:
This narrows it down significantly, since primarily based on my analysis this code can imply something from the gasoline cap is just too unfastened to the engine’s about to blow up. So naturally I’ve tightened the gasoline cap and am hoping for the most effective, as a result of if it’s something extra sophisticated than that then I’m out of my depth.
Fuck it, I’m leasing a Hyundai
