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Home MMA

‘I’m Going To Jail!’

June 19, 2025
in MMA
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‘I’m Going To Jail!’


Uncle Coco was trippin’ …

It has been nearly two weeks since Kayla Harrison ran by way of Julianna Pena to win the Final Combating Championship (UFC) ladies’s Bantamweight belt at UFC 316 in Newark, New Jersey (watch highlights).

It’s possible you’ll not have seen on the time, however slapstick comedian and avid UFC fan Joey Diaz was entrance row, and somebody grabbed a clip of him locked into the struggle.

And for those who suppose he appeared excessive, you’d be right. Nonetheless, humorous sufficient, he’s not observing Harrison’s butt; quite the opposite, he’s fearful about getting arrested by Secret Service brokers who was in attendance as a result of President Donald Trump was within the constructing.

“I instructed you I went to that UFC final week, however I didn’t let you know guys the entire f—king story of what I went by way of mentally,” Diaz mentioned on his podcast, The Church of What’s Occurring Now. “I went to the UFC, and I f—king ate the edibles, and I sat there, and I went to my pocket. I had a little bit baggie with perhaps a gram of mushrooms.

“I took half, and I ate them,” Diaz added. “However, as I used to be consuming them, I spotted I’m within the f—king entrance row, on digicam, with a baggie in my f—king hand, and I’m like, ‘they’re gonna throw me below the f—king jail!’

“Once I began getting excessive on every little thing, I seen once I would sit again, there was a f—king agent taking a look at me, simply at me, like locked eyes,” Diaz mentioned. “And she or he had one other agent who was simply taking a look at me—it was a girl with white hair who was cute, and one other associate who was a white dude, and so they had been taking a look at me like pins.

“So now, in my THC paranoia and the mushroom paranoia, I’m pondering I f—ked up,” Diaz continued. “They noticed the mushroom bag. However, not solely that, I gave them my social safety quantity and my background data. Why? As a result of that’s what I wanted to offer them earlier than I went to the UFC, as a result of Trump was there.

“I’m sitting there going, I’m going to f—king jail,” Diaz added. “Everyone thought I used to be taking a look at Kayla Harrison’s ass. I’m like, I’m going to f—king jail. They’re simply ready for me to rise up.”

“I’m like, God rattling it — they’re going to f—king arrest me,” Diaz mentioned. “He’s like, ‘No, no, no,’ as a result of it was [Joe] Rogan’s handler. He’s [ex-military] or f—king regardless of the f—okay he’s. He’s like, ‘No, I do know that woman. She’s not gonna do something to you.

“Jesus, I used to be scared the entire evening,” Diaz concluded. “I believed I used to be gonna rise up to depart, and so they had been gonna go, ‘Mr. Diaz, we have to speak to you.”

Fortunately, Diaz didn’t get stopped by a Secret Service agent and simply scared himself half to dying. Maybe he gained’t eat magic mushrooms subsequent time he attends a UFC occasion.

Yeah, in all probability not.

To checkout UFC’s upcoming schedule of occasions click on right here.



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