Additional to yesterday’s put up, and digitization laying waste to humanity, do you ever get the sensation that you just’ll someday be pedaling by way of a blighted hellscape of bricked Vanmoofs and inoperable Chicken scooters?
Yea, the time shall come when all these cursed mobility corporations shall go bankrupt. Severed from their deserted apps, these infernal contraptions shall now not operate. In every single place, legions of the possessed shall fall face first upon the pavement as their conveyances fail:
And on today solely the true believers–those that trip human-powered bicycles–shall be spared. Smugly, we will survey the panorama with perverse satisfaction as we pedal in good circles wherever we select. The clipless, the toe-clipped, and the flat-pedaled alike shall rejoice collectively and forged apart their meaningless variations. The Roadies shall dance with the Retrogrouches. The Bikepackers shall lie with the Stunning Godzillas. Metal and crabon shall now not conflict; as a substitute it shall be solid collectively into frames of unparalleled energy and a featherbed trip high quality, laterally stiff and eternally compliant. The Time-Touring Retro-Fred shall lastly return from the Planet Tridork, and a Nice Peace will reign for a thousand years:
Or one thing.
However sure, the times when you can maintain a machine going simply so long as you have been capable of combat off the rust are disappearing within the rearview mirror, as now they’re all “good” and as such must be linked to a central mind:
Fuck it, I’m shopping for a Plymouth:
Luckily for cyclists, there are nonetheless choices for these of us who refuse to relinquish the simplicity of yesteryear:
The Homer began life as an upright rambler:
Nevertheless it’s since advanced right into a type of be-fendered sport roadster and I need to say it excels in its present guise. It feels comfy but quick and light-weight on its toes, and between the lengthy wheelbase, the vast gear vary, and the drop bars, hitting the climbs really feels good–you simply roll over that crumbling highway floor and maintain downshifting seemingly eternally with that silky-smooth friction shifter such as you’re sinking right into a thick down mattress cowl.
It actually makes you marvel what all that fancy fashionable highway bike tech is for, sort of like if you drink a glass of cool, refreshing water and marvel what the hell the purpose of alkaline water is:
I admit I additionally didn’t know who Andrew Jackson was after I noticed this truck, and within the technique of discovering out I got here throughout this video of him driving inconsiderately in Tokyo:
He’s a powerful rider and I did my greatest to take pleasure in it, however I stored anticipating him to collide with a pedestrian on these little aspect streets, which made me nervous:
However at the very least he was carrying a helmet.
