This story was excerpted from Brian McTaggart’s Astros Beat e-newsletter. To learn the total e-newsletter, click on right here. And subscribe to get it commonly in your inbox.
The beginning of a brand new 12 months means it’s an opportunity for everybody to set some objectives. That’s even true for the Astros, who’re as soon as once more among the many favorites to contend for a World Sequence title. With the beginning of Spring Coaching across the nook, listed here are some off-the-wall — and utterly fabricated — predictions for the Astros in 2024:
Bryan Abreu: Abreu is so unhittable, baseball adjustments its guidelines to permit hitters to ask for the “intentional strikeout” so that they don’t should step into the field towards him.
José Abreu: He finds his energy stroke from the get-go and begins to include sliding into the dugout on the conclusion of every of his house run trots.
Jose Altuve: Altuve cements himself as the best Astros participant in historical past by incomes his second MVP award and profitable town’s mayoral race in a landslide particular election.
Yordan Alvarez: The slugger hits a house run thus far that the parents down the highway at NASA reply by suspending all house missions whereas he’s on the plate.
Alex Bregman: After certainly one of his horses wins the Kentucky Derby, Bregman begins mimicking a trotting horse every time he rounds the bases.
Hunter Brown: Detroit native exhibits up at Spring Coaching carrying blue face paint after his Lions win their first Tremendous Bowl championship.
Yainer Diaz: After lastly getting an opportunity to grow to be the beginning catcher, Diaz goals to make up for misplaced at-bats from 2023 by attempting to persuade supervisor Joe Espada he may play the function of Victor Caratini.
Mauricio Dubón: A Gold Glove winner on the utility place in 2023, Dubón vows to play all 9 positions in a single sport this season.
J.P. France: The correct-hander shaves his trademark mustache, however now not will get to ask his teammates in the event that they know the way quick they have been driving over the pace restrict.
Chas McCormick: The “Chas Chomp” is changed by the “McCormick Moonwalk,” which sweeps the nation and lands him on Dancing with the Stars.
Jeremy Peña: The baseball neighborhood is shocked when Peña ends his house run drought on Opening Day and proceeds to bench press the catcher after crossing house plate.
Ryan Pressly: His walk-up music, “God’s Gonna Lower You Down” by Johnny Money, is heard a lot at Minute Maid Park that it exhibits up on the Prime 40 music charts.
Kyle Tucker: After struggling to determine whether or not to put on batting gloves full time the final two seasons, Tucker unsuccessfully tries to promote his teammates on batting mittens.
Framber Valdez: The lefty permits so many floor balls that the infield grass at Minute Maid Park should be changed following every certainly one of his begins.
Justin Verlander: There’s not a dry eye in the home when Verlander vows to pitch till he’s 50 years outdated, however provided that the Astros commerce for him three extra occasions.
