Sizzling canine, glizzy, meat pipe: they’re all one in the identical, however on right now’s celebration of Independence Day for the US, they’re public enemy No. 1.
The Nathan’s Sizzling Canine Consuming Contest, the preeminent aggressive consuming competitors, has change into a time-honored custom on July 4 for the reason that Seventies. However with out Joey Chestnut, the GOAT of aggressive consuming, the occasion has been sapped of its star energy. The drama of a newcomer claiming the throne will you’ll want to create some intrigue, however with out Chestnut, the toppling of data or the draw of a possible upset has gone down the drain together with the hot-dog-flavored water. Solely the canines stay, however all this speak of encased meat has me pondering…
Which Lions participant would win the Nathan’s Sizzling Canine Consuming Contest?
At this level within the offseason, there are a number of gamers to select from as a result of the roster—similar to a beef frank—won’t ever be as packed as it’s now. All of that is ridiculous conjecture as a result of I haven’t a clue about anybody’s consuming habits or potential to place down franks, so under no circumstances am I selecting on anybody on this train.
Naturally, individuals would assume the large guys located alongside the offensive and defensive strains are probably the most able to consuming scorching canines in bulk, however look no additional than former NFL participant William “The Fridge” Perry’s paltry efficiency in 2003 the place he was solely capable of abdomen 4 scorching canines and buns earlier than bowing out of the competitors early.
So the first trait we’re actually searching for in a aggressive eater on this Lions roster is somebody with perseverance and intestinal fortitude. Who’s going to maintain powering down these scorching canines when the ache units in and the bubbly guts get percolating?
Again in 2014, Michael Rothstein—pal of the PODcast and former Lions beat author for ESPN.com—had a recurring “Query of the Week” article the place he would collect a cross-section of opinions from Lions gamers and coaches (and generally opponents) about wide-ranging matters. When he polled the Lions locker room about who would win an consuming contest, loads of gamers instantly recognized guard Larry Warford, a participant who was over 330 kilos when he arrived to Detroit in 2013, because the man to beat. However Warford was adamant he wasn’t that form of eater, and when he and fellow offensive lineman LaAdrian Waddle speculated who might be victorious as an alternative, they highlighted a few tight ends: Brandon Pettigrew and Joseph Fauria.
With all of this intel in thoughts, Frank Ragnow is actually up close to the highest of that listing. He’s the primary title that involves thoughts with regards to taking part in and performing via ache, however I’m undecided how he feels about scorching canines. If this was a fish and chips consuming contest, there’d be no cause to proceed sifting via this Lions roster: this may be Ragnow’s occasion to lose.
Sam LaPorta is one other contender to contemplate. He’s younger, powerful, and just lately faraway from school which has to account for one thing. He’s nonetheless geared up with a abdomen able to withstanding the form of onslaught a bunch of processed meat would current.
And lastly, to spherical out the competitors, Colby Sorsdal as a result of who isn’t going to wager on this man?
Who do you suppose would find yourself the winner of a scorching canine consuming contest amongst this Lions roster?
Have a contented and protected 4th of July, everybody.