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Home Cycling

Too Hot To Handlebar

June 23, 2025
in Cycling
Reading Time: 20 mins read
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Too Hot To Handlebar


Sizzling.

Too scorching sort.

I do know what you’re pondering. “Sizzling?!? That’s not scorching! Sizzling’s after I can seize my body tubes and rotate them within the lugs.” Not less than so says the recent climate equal of this man:

Unsure who that may be, however perhaps it’s Good Hydration Pack Man:

Looks like that system is one glitchy app away from waterboarding you.

As for me, I’m sweating it out, and I’m happy to report I’ve now formally reached the intimate “favourite denims” section with the Roadini:

[Photo taken about eight weeks and thirty degrees ago.]

Like my favourite denims, the Roadini is all the time shut at hand, and I typically simply seize it with out giving a lot consideration to the remainder of my wardrobe. Additionally like my favourite denims, I by no means wash it. Hopefully it could face up to my famously corrosive sweat, which welded my erstwhile Artisanal Singlespeed’s stem to its steerer tube and required me to repaint the Milwaukee:

After all, the carbon fiber equal of Minnesota Humblebrag Man and Good Hydration Bike Man would simply inform me to get a plastic bike already, as a result of the one factor riders of carbon fiber may be smug about is that their bikes don’t rust:

That’s the AI’s tackle “Smug Carbon Fiber Bicycle Man,” by the way in which. It’s getting higher. I’d say it nonetheless obtained the handlebars improper however I might completely see Canyon popping out with one thing like this:

And no, the left hand isn’t an AI-generated error, that’s Canyon’s new rear-mounted drop-bar particular bar finish. They’re calling it the Reverse Cowboy, and it’s solely appropriate with the brand new wi-fi shifter from SRAM:

SRAM have gone to nice lengths to enhance the ergonomics of the brake fluid reservoir on their highway and gravel levers, and to date early critiques point out that the brand new DILDO (Direct Built-in Liquid Supply Output) hydraulic braking system feels nice within the hand. Initially it was supposed to come back out final season, however SRAM needed to do an entire rebrand after they discovered that their preliminary identify for the lever, “PNS Mechanism,” was already taken:

Rumor has it the next-generation DILDO lever will embody good hydration expertise, which can mean you can use a SRAM AXS Wi-fi Blip to ship a spurt of fluid on to your face.

As for carbon fiber bikes, how does this one seize you?

That’s an Ibis DV9, dimension L, and it’s on the market:

Regardless that my perspiration is probably the closest liquid on earth to a common solvent, I’m keen on metal bicycles. However I’m additionally a inflexible all-terrain bicycle fanatic, and this can be a very good inflexible all-terrain bicycle that has not seen loads of use:

It’s additionally shockingly mild. (I imply I journey a Jones LWB, so my thought of a “shockingly mild” mountain bike is relative, however nonetheless.) I don’t care about bicycle weight till I deal with a very mild one, type of like how I’ve no real interest in desert till you place some in entrance of me:

Anyway, like each bike my good friend owned it’s principally no-nonsense:

Although it’s obtained some fancy stuff the place it counts:

In the event you’re drop me a line:

Possibly at some point I’ll see you on the market passing me on this factor.

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